Thank you to all of the dads who have made so many wonderful dad jokes over the years, many of which I stole for this video. There is a partial list of sources below! Thanks everyone for your kind wishes during paternity leave. It's been intense and wonderful. I am glad I had a joyful way to return to this channel even though there's a lot to be concerned about in the world and my country right now. I really love making these videos, and I am very lucky to have this thing in my life. If you're able and interested, John and I will be having many fun times at NerdCon: Nerdfighteria in Boston, February 25th and 26th. http://www.nerdconnerdfighteria.com/ I just found out I was dating a communist. https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/5in41v/i_just_found_out_i_was_dating_a_communist/ Father Figure https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/5j1n2j/why_call_it_a_dad_bod/ I can saw wood just by looking at it https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/5gtbx0/good_one_from_my_dad_i_can_cut_wood_by_just/ I wear my leather shoes when I’m sneaking around because they’re MADE of hide. https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/3ogaz9/leather_armor_is_perfect_for_sneaking_because_its/ Why do scuba divers fall backwards out of boats? https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/4oj01b/why_do_scuba_divers_always_fall_backwards_out_of/ I love how the earth rotates, it really makes my day. https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/5jiqxs/i_love_how_the_earth_rotates/ Tupperware? Tupperhere! https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/2p183h/even_when_hes_alone/ You know where you get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market. https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/1s05hz/dad_joke_on_thanksgiving/ “How long is dinner going to be?” https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/257hs0/today_my_dad_was_making_the_dinner/ Oh boiling water...you will be mist! https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/395oop/rip_boiling_water_you_shall_be_mist/ Good Morning, how’d you sleep? https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/1ssjxi/how_did_you_sleep/ What book are you reading? https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/4up4pu/i_asked_my_girlfriend_what_book_she_was_reading/ Why won’t you untangle! https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/3p854k/wife_yelling_at_earbuds_why_wont_you_just_untangle/ Orion’s belt is a huge waste of space https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/3yfvty/orions_belt_is_a_huge_waist_of_space/ What do you get when you divide a poop into three pieces https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/32kqdg/what_do_you_get_when_you_divide_poop_by_three/ How many sides does a circle have? https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/4mzgzw/how_many_sides_does_a_circle_have/ Huh...there’s a hole in my shoe… ME TOO! It’s how I get my foot inside! Jean Jacket https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/3rd0ql/my_wife_wanted_to_take_our_other_two_dogs_on_a/?ref=search_posts HILL AREAS!! https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/56vevx/mountains_arent_just_funny/ Will Smith https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/56bw6r/how_do_you_find_will_smith_in_the_snow/ ---- Subscribe to our newsletter! http://nerdfighteria.com/newsletter/ And join the community at http://nerdfighteria.com/ http://effyeahnerdfighters.com/ Help transcribe videos - http://nerdfighteria.info/ John's twitter - http://twitter.com/johngreen John's tumblr - http://fishingboatproceeds.tumblr.com/ Hank's twitter - http://twitter.com/hankgreen Hank's tumblr - http://edwardspoonhands.tumblr.com/